Her Alopecia Womens Hair Loss Forums

Hi, I wasn't dating anyone when my hair started falling out. Now I'm wearing wigs and of course, all the friends and family that loved me before still do. But I'm very self-conscious now about meeting men and have been avoiding dating because it might get touchy-feely and he might yank off my hair. So when do you broach the subject? My wig is very natural looking and most people don't believe me when I tell them it's a wig so a guy probably wouldn't just know. But I don't want to tell all my business on a first day. Any advice?

Tell him you would like to take things slowly and get to know him first before anything physical happens. This would also be a good test to see if he's a good guy or a hound dog.

Hmmm... I found that the longer I waited to tell someone about my HL, the more anxiety and stress it caused. I would rather someone refect me from day one than reject me after I care about them a little bit....

True, but you want to make sure this is a good guy to let in on a pretty big secret. (if that's how you are approaching it)

I'd do a lot of talking (in general) and one or two dates. If he seems like someone you would go out with for any length of time, then it's time to let him in on it.

I can't promise that it won't scare some away, but I've been on these boards long enough to know that A LOT of women on here have found wonderful men, who could care less about what is happening on top of their heads.

Good luck! I think if you act very confident and a matter of fact about it, that will help too. Don't be apologetic. You have nothing to apologize for. Men are attracted to confidence too. The fact that you can still hold your head high and live your life despite something this stressful happening to you is a very attractive quality and will shine through.

YES, the more confident YOU are about it, the better he will feel.

am i the only one thinking if i get the best hair piece i can and attach it the best way i can and be wary of him touching my hair then why does it have to be this HUGE secreat? men are extreamly visual anyways and in my eyes its something i have to deal with, i dont want anyone to know! (only my mum knows i have alopicia). and even if i do get serious with someone i figured il just explain i have a system in as my hairs crappy and thin so its not all my natural hair? am i just naive to think my hair isnt this massive dirty secreate? i mean if i didnt have hair los and was wearin extra hair for cosmetic reasons i wouldnt be the slightest bit touchy so..

I've had bad experiences with telling guys, or them finding out I wear a wig. In retrospect I should have learned that the man worth having won't care.

However, in the end, I really either don't want them to know, period or at the very least, I don't want anyone to see me without my wig, so I am looking into bonding.