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How Do You Find Love With Hair Loss?and Believe You Deserve It!

Discussion in 'Girl Talk!' started by Girlyouareafirework, Apr 25, 2018.

  1. Girlyouareafirework

    Girlyouareafirework New Member

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    When you suffer from thinning hair or hair loss, one of the greatest support there can be is from your partner. A supportive partner will aid your mental health by reminding you that you are still beautiful, important and worth everything life has to offer with or without hair. And that is something I yearn for. I wish to find someone who'll accept me as I am.

    I am in a relationship for a few months now and my boyfriend likes beautiful long hair, could say, that's his type. Obviously my question, then why me? He says he pursued me because he loved my personality & character. There have been days when he gives suggestions about how I should wear my hair or style it. And I feel this pressure of needing a good hair while I am with him with the constant insecurity of appearing less beautiful than other women. This is not how a relationship should feel like. After all, what everyone wants in a relationship is to feel accepted for who they are! So, I decided to share with him that I feel I may not be able to make him happy because I don't have the hair he likes. He got confused but assured me he loves me nevertheless. I also shared that I have lost a lot of hair and although I see some growth it is not promising & makes me worry. He was supportive and understanding saying it is probably stress because I have a very stressful work life.

    Yet, I am having a hard time believing I am worth this love :( I fear that a decade later, he may wake up & regret choosing me or no longer find me attractive. I feel I should do him good & let him find someone better. I can't help feeling like I should be alone. Ugh! :(

    I am worried hair loss is killing my self-esteem and sabotaging my relationship.

    How do you deal with a new relationship?? and continue to believe you deserve love?
     
  2. psoub

    psoub New Member

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    Hi!
    I am surprised you got no feedback on your post. From what I read, your victimisation is worse than the hair loss. Please don't be offended by what I say. I am struggling through the SAME SHIT. But feeling down and not fighting against it, is having hair loss win, in a way.
    Having hair loss requires balls of steel. This is why he likes you. You are more than your hair - concentrate on that.
    Saying "let him find someone better" is the worst thing you can say - girl!!!! Come on!!!
    Talking about it with him is letting hair loss settle in the bedroom. I am a huge fighter against that. If you don't want hair loss to win over you AND your relationship, deal with it. Find solutions. Fight against it. Get a hair topper or a wig. But do NOT drain your partner with it and give him a hair loss problem when he doesn't have one. YOU CAN DO IT GIRL !!!

    About your last question, "How do you deal with a new relationship?? and continue to believe you deserve love?". I personally give it all to connection. And the people who love/like me, don't give a FUCK about my hair. That's why I love them and I love them back with all my heart. I sometimes like to think that Hair loss is a great cleanser of stupid people. It cleanses the shallow people and brings you the one that truly like/love you for what you are - which is the most important thing. Whether you have long, short, green or black hair, they will look at you the SAME way. So fuck hair loss, welcome hair toppers and wigs and whatever solution. What people want for you is too feel good about yourself FIRST, and they will accompany and support you in the journey if you decide to fight for yourself. But if you complain, and get overwhelmed by it, it's hard for people who love you to fall in the trap with you. And you cannot ask them to be strong for you. That's not their job.
    So, if the guy doesn't like me, f* him. If he likes women with hair but no kick-ass amazing personality, he's missing out.
    I have to remind myself constantly that I should convey who I am, instead of hiding and letting hair loss win. Thats' how I deal with it. It's hard, but it is possible. And then, when a relationship starts, I do what I can to forget about it and concentrate on how he looks at me. You can talk about it, but in a positive way. And he doesn't like it, then end it! Next ;):p
     

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