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I'm So Terrified, Please Help Me! Te Or Something Else?

Discussion in 'Women's General Hair Loss Discussions' started by Barbamama, Jan 25, 2019.

  1. Barbamama

    Barbamama New Member

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    Hi Everyone!

    First of all, sorry for my englist! I’m here because I am completely hopeless, and I'm searching for hope everywhere. I really need some advise, or strenght. I’m in my early 30s and I’m in a middle of a big shedding again.

    10 years ago, from a day to another my hair had started to falling out in clamps. I had a diffuse hair loss. I had lost the 1/3 of my hair in months. It revealed that I have Hashimoto disease, and elevated ANA levels, no other reason, no major trauma. Only Diane 35 helped, it stopped the loss, but nothing has came back, no recovery at all. 3 years later I quit Diane, I had a small shed, but it balanced itself quite fast. Luckily I had a very dense hair before the first shed so I was grateful of what was remained, despite the fact, that my sides became visibly thinner. Over the years I didn't noticed any thinning.

    But after a very bad wisdom teeth surgery, months of inflamation and weight loss last May I had a big shed again. At the top of it I have lost 400 hairs under the shower. It was devastating. I’m a mom of a 2 year old, but I wasn’t able to think about anyting else, just my loss. 2,5 months later I found a dermatologist, and she gave me Alpicort Plus which contains prednisolone, and estrogen. I had tried it during my first shed, back then it didn’t helped, but now it stopped the shedding in two weeks. At the first 2 weeks I used it every day, than just 2-3 times a week. In October and November only a few times, when it came into my mind, but I think, that the shedding was normal (40-50 hairs when I washed my hair, 30 on other days). Unfortunately I didn’t see any regrowth, but I tried not to be nervous because of it. I had lost the 1/3 of my hair again. How is it possible???
    In december I started to realize, maybe the hair loss will come back. And, for why not, in Christmas day I counted 100 hairs under the shower. The next two weeks the shed was not that bad like 6 months befor (50-150 hairs daily), but I started to panic again, and use Alpicort. I have no more hair to lose! Alpicort helped, but honlesty, I dont know what is the normal amount of shed, when you have that thin hair. And is it normal, that I didn’t see any major regrowth since May?
    And for the top of it, now my TSH is way above the normal level because the stress (my Endo said, that TSH is a stress related hormon).
    It seems to me, that my hairline and the frontal parts gets thinner and thinner literally every day (a take pictures every day). What if it's Androgenetic Alopecia, could it be that fast?

    So now I really don’t know what to do. My closest partner became anxiety. I can feel the wind on my scalp since May. My sides are so thin, just a few hairs. On my right temple I have no hair at all, and I can see my scalp at the very front, but the thinning is obviously diffuse again. I’m terrified, that my hair won’t come back, like it happened 10 years ago, even I have my thyroid in balance. I’m afraid, that it still could be worse. I hate to touch my scalp, I hate to see myself in a mirror, I feel shame. I’m afraid, that my husband won’t find my attractive, and I bring shame on my little girl because the way I look like now, or I will look like if hair loss continues, or another big shed come. I know, that it's so stupid, and offending and I'm a deeper person, than that, but that's how I feel now.

    Please tell me, that it’s possible to get back my hair somehow???
    That now it really “just” telogen effluvium, and I have the chance for the regrowth. My mom had telogen effluvium in her late 40s because of medicines or/and menopausa?? and it didn’t grow back for her too.

    The saddest thing, that I had removed my wisdom teeth, because we wanted another baby, and I tried to avoid any difficulty during pregnany, and now no baby and no hair.
    Thank you for every answer!
    Sorry for the long post!
     
    Farrah711 likes this.
  2. 3monkeys&me

    3monkeys&me New Member

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    Hi Barbamama, I can certainly relate to your situation. I had some problems with my thyroid (TSH too low) and female hormones (estrogen and progesterone too low) a few years ago and experienced a shed that took 1/2 of my hair and much of my mental health. The shed finally has slowed (3 years later) and my hair is slowly growing back. I so wanted a quick fix but what I wish I would have told myself years ago was to get help with the anxiety. I now see a psychologist regularly and this has helped me with my self-esteem and confidence immensely. Managing the stress of the anxiety, I think, helped to slow the shed. Also, when I was feeling my worst I also bought myself a cute wig...and I wore it. It was a relief to walk out the door with my family and not have to think about my hair. There are so many cute toppers and wigs, affordable solutions. Don't beat yourself up for wearing hair. Do what you need to do to take care of yourself. You are worth it!
     
  3. Barbamama

    Barbamama New Member

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    Dear 3monkeys&me!

    Thank you for the response, it means a lot.
    I've try hard to keep my mind as healthy as it's possible, I asked help from a psychologist too, but I felt like she didn't helped.
    I use herbs for my nerves, I meditate every evening, and now I try to avoid mirrors :)
    I am blessed, I have a very loving family, and I know, that it is hard for them, to see me in this mood.
    I also know, that anxiety just makes it worst, I have to figure it out how to deal with the loss.
    Even I am a pessimist, because of my bad experiences, I can't stop hoping, that one day it will be over, I will get back my hair.
    Or at least a will find a solution, that helps me to live a full life.
    Many thanks for your response once again!
     
  4. Barbamama

    Barbamama New Member

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    Dear Tina!
    I'ts just 9 months since I have to deal with the hair loss again, I can't imagine how long 5 years with this anxiety could be for you. I feel like, that I lost a lots of enjoyable moments with my baby girl. I hate myself because of it! I really don't want to do this anymore.
    I wish you strenght, and all the best!
     

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